No one wants your dreams more than you do
The future is dependent on what you do today.
Fearless Journeys began the new year with a new book: Bet on Yourself by Major League Soccer star Chris Mueller, who will be joining us for a live session to discuss the book when we complete it in February.
Our homework for this first week of 2024 was simply to read the short introduction and Chapter 1. If you haven’t done so yet, it’s ok, there’s plenty of time to catch up. So order the book on Amazon and join us. We do our best at Fearless Journeys to also provide you with short summaries each week, which we hope are helpful whether you are reading the book or not.
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In the introduction, Chris seeks to remind each of us that: “No one wants your dreams more than you do.” With this pronouncement, it’s then incumbent on YOU (and no one else) to work each day to turn YOUR dreams into a reality.
As we start to dream, we often encounter obstacles. However, we need to:
block out the distractions
eliminate any doubts
work diligently to maximizing your potential.
I love that word: potential.
We all have the capacity to become or develop into something more in the future. But the future we dream of doesn’t just arrive. We have to work in the present (today!) in order to have that better future.
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Chris opens ups to us in the introduction. At the age of 13, his parents got a divorce. Divorces are very difficult situations for everyone in the family, but especially so on kids. And more than half of families today experience divorce, so it’s very relative for so many reading this book. It’s also important to recognize: we all have problems that come our way that are out of our control.
Despite the difficulty that his teenage years were starting with, Chris said that he “made the choice that I wasn’t going to let life happen to me, but rather make it happen for me.” He adds that “it was vital to not let a situation that was out of my control, determine my destiny.”
Later on, while playing college soccer for the University of Wisconsin, he realized he still had room to grow. One day a trainer handed him a book called Mind Gym: An Athlete’s Guide to Inner Excellence.
This book helped change his mindset about the potential he still had. Up to that point, Chris had never really been a fan of reading, but it’s amazing what one book can do. That led him to one book after another.
Today, in addition to achieving his dream of playing professional soccer, and having played for the U.S. Men’s National Team, Chris is also now an author (and in 2020, he even started a book club). He achieved all of this before his 25th birthday. I imagine his potential is still unfolding, but he’s an example of what we are each capable of if we are willing to be disciplined and work hard to improve ourselves each day.
Chris gives us a good reminder in the introduction: “Although we’re working towards creating a better future, that doesn’t mean we should fall into the trap of destination-oriented happiness.”
“Your meaning and value are not tied to the things you accomplish and achieve.”
You also must enjoy the process. Enjoy the journey — the fearless journey.
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In Chapter 1, Chris is focused on something he is obsessed with: the ability to learn. He points out that learning is not limited to the classroom. It’s something we can and should constantly be doing — every day.
Obviously, Chris spends a lot of time reminding us of one of his favorite ways to learn: through books. But he also reminds us we learn through our experiences, our trials and errors, and perhaps mostly through our own failures and mistakes.
He tells us not to play it safe, because that’s a life without mistakes. And a life without mistakes is a life without learning. Of course, once we make a mistake, we should not repeat it, otherwise we really did not learn anything from the mistake.
Anytime you are venturing out to try something new, Chris says we should consider the risk vs. the reward. Put another way: if you achieve the desired outcome, is the reward worth the risk it might take to achieve it? If so, proceed.
Of course, “if you are not failing and making mistakes, then you simply are not pushing yourself enough.”
The great thing about books is that they enable us to learn from the best in any field without even having to meet them in person. We can learn from their success and from their mistakes. This can give us a faster path to achieve some of the same things they did and also help us avoid any unnecessary pain and suffering that they went through.
What Chris is doing in this chapter is getting us in the right mindset to learn to be the best version of ourselves possible. This will carry us through the rest of the book.
“Getting yourself in the right frame of mind is arguably the most important step towards your goal,” he says. “Having the right mindset is like having the proper equipment before stepping out into the playing field.”
I know Chris is a big fan of James Clear, author of Atomic Habits and that comes through in one of his pieces of advice in this chapter: “Transform your mindset and identify as someone who loves to learn, someone who is constantly trying to improve, and someone who is continuously striving to focus on your craft.”
In other words, before you build a new habit, you must tell yourself you already are what you’re trying to become. So, in this case, if you’re trying to become a more diligent reader, tell yourself you’re already a reader. Tell yourself you’re a lifelong learner. You’ll then chose to do things that identify with that identity.
We live in a time where so much education is available to us at little or no cost. For the first time in history, there are tons of books, podcasts, and YouTube videos available at our disposal 24/7 — on virtually any subject we want to learn about.
Don’t let all the other clutter and distractions on the internet (or on the news!) get in the way of all the amazing resources available to us to grow and reach a potential we have yet to tap.
“The only thing holding you back in this time of infinite abundance, is your own level of awareness, your mindset, and your beliefs!”
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This concept of “learning from the best” in chapter one also applies to learning from those around you. That also means you might need to limit who is in your everyday life — because we learn from the good and bad habits and traits of those around us.
Chris tells us: “Don’t waste time around people who aren’t driven in the same way that you are as you chase your dreams.” As the old adage goes: “you are who you hang out with!”
This doesn’t necessarily mean you have to cut out life long friends or others. It just means that you need to “create boundaries in order to protect yourself, your goals, and your energy.”
And one final reminder from Chris in this chapter: “don’t ever find yourself being the smartest or hardest working person in the room. If that is the case, you are in the wrong room.”
And remember that your future is dependent on what you do today.
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So let’s continue to get after it. I encourage you to take part in some of the action items Chris has put together in each of these chapters. These are great ways to really put into action some of the concepts he is guiding us through.
For this coming week, your homework is to read chapters 2 & 3 by next Friday, January 12. These chapters will help us to set our vision and then be able to understand how to apply our desire, discipline, and dedication.
The future is dependent on what you do today.